Species Profile

Seviglius Skinnilius
Common Name: Big Bird
Description: Up to 2m in length, 130-140 pounds. Baby-like skin and inability to grow facial hair possibly stem from past lineage with Native American Indian. Fingers often stained orange from Cheeto abuse. Cell phone with hand firmly pressed to ear forms awkward, arm-like communication appendage.
Range: Snow-covered mountains of the Pacific Northwest and Western Canada, Tacoma.
Diet: Skittles, Coca-Cola
Mating Habits: While sporadic and prone to Inebriated Levitation Syndrome (ILS), also known as "Whiskey Dick," the Seviglius is actually quite potent and has been known to mate up to 6 times in one nocturnal period. (Researcher's note: Some studies have also shown that it is not uncommon for the Seviglius to become gender-confused, sometimes asking males of similar species if they want to have "sleep-overs" and/or "kiss."
Remarks/Observations: The Seviglius is most commonly known for its lanky build and sporadic, fro-like hair. While normally very docile, it can become quite aggresive during feeding periods if it feels its food source has been infringed upon. The Seviglius' incredible ability to subsist on a diet comprised almost entirely of glucose owes itself to a metabolism that one researcher likened to "that of a hummingbird."

File Photos:


Speciman (background) pictured with a seemingly hungover version of the Lesser-Spotted Zygar (foreground)


In this photo it is quite easy to see the Seviglius' disctinctive hair pattern. Also note the communication appendage instinctively reaching for left ear, although this is certainly one of the few photos that features the Seviglius displaying said appendage without the aid of customary cell phone.