Life, Death, and Hockey

Lots to talk about here on Boosh Clown today. The winds of change are upon us. Spring is in the air! Bees are leaving the comfort of their frozen burrows to take flight and propagate the many flowers that blanket our beautiful planet. Robins are out a-chirping, vying neck and neck with the larks and the thrushes to have their voices heard in the wonderful cacophony of sounds and smells that this special time of year always seems to hold in store.

But let's get down to business.

First off, I am getting extremely excited about the bike trip I plan on taking in late May. One of the things I'm most excited about is my diet. Since I can't cook, I will be forced to either eat fresh foods or already prepared foods. This is extremely exciting, as it is exactly what I did for the majority of my college career (minus the fresh foods). Finally, an excuse to eat Hot Pockets, TV dinners, and corn dogs without having to feel bad about it¹! People can say to me, "Oh man, that must have been awful, having to eat all those pre-packaged foods and pizza pockets you warm up in the microwave," and I can be like, "Yea, totally, it was brutal. I totally would've cooked more often if I had had the chance, but I guess that's just one of the things that comes with being on the road." And then I can rush home gleefully and toss a Tombstone pepperoni pizza in the oven.

I really won't be that unhealthy, though, I think. My diet will basically consist of the following:

Breakfast
1 Power Bar (Apple Cinnamon or Peanut Butter or whatever strikes my fancy)
1 Apple Juice
1 Banana

Healthy so far, right? Yeah, I thought so.

Lunch
Hot Pockets, Chunky soup, deli food, TV dinner, fast food, pre-made sandwich
1 Juice or Gatorade
1 Orange or Apple

Dinner
Basically the same as lunch

Snacks
1 Can of V8 upon terminus of day's riding
Trail Mix, Shot Bloks (These things are awesome. Check out what it says about the Piña Colada variety. ¿Cómo se dice, "fate?"), Fresh Vegetables, Snickers, and assorted goodies between breakfast and lunch, and between lunch and dinner

Not terrible, right? I mean, it could be quite a bit worse. The question is, will I actually stick to a semblance of this diet, or will I end up pulling up to drive-thrus, panniers and all, asking for quarter-pounders and Big Macs? Time will tell, I suppose.

¹Not that I ever felt bad about it. I felt amazing.

In other news, Zucks and the boys over at Facebook have recently added the "People You May Know" feature, which is actually probably old news to you by now. As with all Facebook additions these days I am somewhat indifferent. The last time Facebook actually caused a major upheaval in my life was when they added the "Status" option (this was a huge fucking deal at the time). I don't know what it was but I was fairly outraged and convinced that Facebook was turning into MySpace and thus completely refused to take part in the whole "Status" thing at first, but then slowly got used to the idea and now, as we have all seen, update my status approximately every 45 seconds. So now: "People You May Know," "People You Wish You Knew," "People Your Parents Want You to Know"--what's the difference?

In honor of my friend Kevin from Arizona State I have turned the comments option back on on Boosh Clown, so please comment as much as possible. I turned them off because I read on some site about increasing your "blog traffic" that it can be good to turn comments off because people get turned off when they see blog after blog with "0 Comments." This issue is problematic for two reasons: 1) What the fuck was I doing on an "Increase your blog traffic" website? and 2) Do I really want to attract the type of reader who would be "turned off" by the fact that there are not a lot of comments on my blog? Do I really want anyone to read this? Why are you reading this?

I think I might be going insane.

Anyway, the last thing I will briefly mention is that the Stanley Cup Playoffs are well under way, something all too noticeable up here in The Great White North. Today I went to buy eggs from the Old Man in Cook St. Village and he started talking to me about the games yesterday and how the Flames game should be a "dandy" tonight and the dude that apparently scored two awesome goals yesterday. I did a lot of nodding and smiling and prayed to Brahma that he wouldn't ask me anything that required specific knowledge of the sport, and thankfully he didn't. So, anyway, I totally forgot why I am even mentioning this now but I guess I just thought it might be an endearing example of the cultural differences that exist between two lands separated by such a short distance. Go Flames! (?).

That's all for today, folks. Feel free to contact us here at Blog is the New Blog with any questions you may have. Also, don't forget to vote on the "Should Boosh Clown Have to Drink the Hot Dog Flavored Water" poll at the top left. Only three days remain!

-Boosh Clown

Song of the Day: "Hands Around My Throat" by Death in Vegas